Back to the Basics

So I've been home for a little over a month now. I'm not gonna lie and tell you that everything has been a breeze coming back. It has been quite challenging. Things that I forgot I left, grown from or just got away from while I was in Perth have come back to haunt me in a sense. There have been days that I just want to give up and be like, "God, take me somewhere hot and somewhere where no one knows me." I've had a million things going on in my head like the big question, "WHAT'S NEXT?!" Oh man! I try not to freak out when that question pops up, but I tend to have a mini-anxiety attack or something. I've been in the search for that. The passage in Romans 9: 30-33 sums up my past month. I've been caught up in the "what's next for me in ministry?" and not hearing what God is really saying right in front of me.
This past month I've just been telling myself to slow down. Breathe, Katelyn. Just stop! I haven't been doing that. I've been trying to figure out what God wants for me. I know all the right words I am supposed to say to God, but it's all a formula.
Today, as I was having date time with God, I realized that I have a formula even in that time with Him. I really had to tell myself to just let go. Let go of all expectations and all fear. Let go of all the busyness of being back home. Let go of the way I should be now that I'm back and just BE with God. Guess what?! I still did the whole formula thing. If I say this then God will do this. I just wanted my head to be clear but it wasn't working. I was just getting more and more tangled. That is when I just had to scream at myself to stop. I did. It was in that time that I realized that God just wants me to stop doing things for Him. Stop trying to learn stuff about Him. He said, "Just stop and worship Me because I am YOUR God."
It's during times of worship that I connect the most with God. It's getting back to basics for me that's really freeing.
God taught me that I need to listen to Him. When He says to STOP! I need to stop, breathe and listen. He knows us and knows what we need exactly when we need it. We are the ones that drive ourselves crazy.
Being back in America, I see that we are SOOOO busy! We need to get to the next thing. We need to come across a certain way to people. We need to somehow look like we have it all together and are on top of things. What's the rush? Why are we almost in a state of panic all the time? My question is, "how do we solve this?" The things we go to to cope are like a pain reliever. They relieve the symptoms but not the cause. I'm realizing more and more that God is the remedy to it all. When we try to do do do and make ourselves look a certain way, we aren't trusting God.
This is only my opinion, but I think that in this time of economic crisis, God is saying, "Come back to Me. Trust Me." It is a wake up call to us. God desperately wants our hearts. Just look at what He has done for us. Look! He sent His Son as the ultimate act of Love. This is real love. It is perfect love. God wants us to accept His love. Just let it in. He doesn't care about the rest of the stuff we do for Him unless we LOVE Him. It's more than words. When we encounter His love, it's life changing.
I am constantly asking myself, "Am I really receiving His love? Do I really love Him?" If I am, "How does my life look different? "
I want to ask you the same, "Are you receiving His love fearlessly? Are you really loving Him?" If so, "Does your life reflect it?"
We tend to do this backwards. If we show God in our actions that we are doing great things for Him then He will love us, but God already loves us.
I challenge you to let His love in. Don't be afraid of what you are going to lose. Live ridicuously for God. He's the only One that makes sense in this world because He is the reason why we exist. Do what you need to do to because (Oh man!) what He has for you is WONDERFUL! Get Back to the Basics!